So you’ve gone through the process of rehab and you’re now out into the “real world.”
Out here, where there are no safe confines of the rehab center to shield you from the triggers and temptations all around you, it can be scary and overwhelming. During your many months in rehab, you’re around peers and counselors whom you can turn to for help. Add to that the fact that inside rehab, your environment is drug and alcohol -free. Now you have to step into the real world and everywhere you turn, there seems to be things that always remind you of your “past life,” that life when you were using or drinking. Nothing but your ego and your compulsions to guide you.
Now that you’re sober, you’re left with the big task of taking responsibility for the damage you’ve left along the way when you were in active addiction. You have to take responsibility for your own choices and the people that you’ve hurt. And it can all be too much–especially when your first and foremost mandate is to make your sobriety your priority.
Have you ever wondered why this is so? It’s so hard to concentrate on being sober when there’s a job that you need to get back to (if it’s still there), a family to feed, relationships to mend, and so many real-life things to face.
Yet throughout all this, putting your recovery first can feel like a selfish act. But you know what–putting your recovery first is a form of self-care, which is imperative in recovery. And when you put self-care first, it means you’re putting sobriety above all else, even your job, even your family. So why should you do this?
1. You’re making that change. Before when you were in active addiction, you’ve put using or drinking first. The drugs or alcohol took center stage in your life. You were selfish then and it was easy to turn around and ignore your responsibilities, your friends, your family, even your health and well-being. But now, you’re caring for yourself, for the first time in many years, most probably. And with this comes sobriety, which is the most important thing right now.
2. You are on a recovery journey. Sobriety doesn’t just mean you don’t drink or use anymore. With recovery, which you chose to undergo along with sobriety, you are on a journey, a commitment to work on yourself first before you can be there for others. You’re making yourself whole again, and this takes time. Now, you start with baby steps, but it will get better as you go further in this path. It can be a lot of hard work, but you;ll know it’s all worth it when the time comes and you can let yourself look back at how much you have accomplished.
3. You have to help yourself first. Again, you can’t help others if you don’t help yourself first. Like the first rule you’ll find in airplane emergency posters and those they insert behind your seats, you have to put on your oxygen mask first before you help others put on theirs. That is an essential to survival and it applies in recovery as well. By putting your sobriety first, you are healing yourself, making yourself be better, so you can be a better spouse, parent, child, or friend to others. Once you’re stable enough in your recovery, and you have a firm foothold on sobriety, everything else will follow.
4. You are staying true to yourself. By putting your sobriety first, you are being true to yourself, to your needs. You are not compromising yourself for the sake of anyone or anything, which can then just bring drastic consequences to your recovery and even take you back to addiction through relapse. The world and its realities can be a lot to deal with, but if you have your sobriety on your side, then you are better equipped to overcome any obstacle.
Remember, it’s not wrong to put your sobriety first, to make it your top priority. It may be hard initially, and there will be times people will give you flack for it–but it will be worth it. Think about your sobriety as the foundation on which you can rebuild your life. Once you’ve got this covered, everything else will follow. But once your foundation of sobriety cracks, everything else will come crashing down.
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